I want to leave here but I don't know if I have the guts to hook up a 24 foot camper behind an SUV and pull it to an un-known location since I've never pulled anything in my life. I don't know if I am ready and willing to turn my back on a large piece of land I paid half for and paid off 6 years early. I am not happy here though, so alone, The people around here still don't even wave when they see one another. How I long to go back to a populated area, maybe even my old stomping grounds were I could listen to the waves roll in and smell the salt water. Summer will soon be here and I am stuck here alone. I thought when I moved here it would be different, thought the fresh air and sunshine would be great. Well it is, but what a price to pay. Thank you heavenly Father, I love you!!!
My mood: extremely cheerful
I enjoy this site so much! it is where I can be myself and say what I think and how I honestly feel. Belle is doing Great! Dr. French said she did a lot better than some pets that he sees. She goes back March 5th to get her stitches out and get a lime booster shot. Sun is shinning already this early, it is beautiful. It is going to be a Good Day!! I can tell already. About two weeks ago I was walking by my living room window when I saw what looked like a white plastic grocery bag flapping in the wind then I realized the wind was not blowing, so I took a closer look and it was a person...she had tripped and fallen into the ditch behind my mailbox. She was unable to get out by herself so I tried to help her we made it, she said she was walking and triped. She is ok, that is good. Haven't seen her since. That ditch must be deeper than I ever thought it was so I stepped into it and sure enough it comes up to my knees. I guess that only goes to show that things can appear different than what they really are.
Life around here is pretty quiet, never see anything much happen. The people here don't speak tp each other. I've never lived in such an area. Every where else I've lived I knew almost all of my neighbors. Well I must be here for a reason. Thank You Heavenly Father!!!
My mood: extremely grateful
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Today I need to buckle down and get some coffee/tea accounts set up. Over the weekend I was able to set up my webcam but it doesn't have audio? can't figure out why? I followed all the instructions I could find. My daughter has a birthday this wednesday (16th) and I bought her one. She lives about 250 miles from me and I'd really like to be able to see and chat with her now and then. All I can do is keep trying. I am starting to feel a bit better, really need to get this OCS (office coffee service) off the ground it will give me something to think about rather than what these doctors tell me.
It just stared raining (7:37A.M.) such a relaxing sound, listening to the rain hit the roof. Sky is gray.
Belle will be 6 months old the 16th as well as my daughters birthday on that day. Need to make Belle an apt. with DR. Forest to get the rest of her shots and spayed.
Its hard for me to beleive I haven't visited EP in such awhile, been working on SunRise Coffee and Tea (OCS.)
Bought all my product, brewers, tables and everything I need to get going. Now to do it.
I've lived in this small town for 20 years and don't know a soul here. Know my 2 neighbors just by waveing at them as we pass doubt if they know my name. This is a lonesome place. So many times I've thought about leaving and going some place else.
Well, it is 7:45A.M. I need to get going. It is going to be a very good Week!!!
My mood: a bit wonderful!
Hard to believe the time goes by so fast. Maybe I am trying to get things done and don't realize the time. Woke up at 5:15 a.m. this morning after going to bed at 1:a.m..
It was a very quiet weekend except for yesterday. Belle was out in the back yard and I heard her barking so I went to check on her when all the sudden I heard the neighbors dogs barking and an alarm sounding. I waited to see if I could hear any noise coming from over there, they live anbout 1/4 mile from me, but no more sounds were penetrating the airwaves. A few minutes later a large dark colored 4x4 raced up their hilly driveway. I started praying, just a natural thing I do when I think someone is injured or in danger. About 10 years ago my neighbor (same neighbor) was in his back yard when he was mistaken for a turkey and shot in his spine rendering him paralyzed from the waist down. He has tipped that wheel chair over in his front yard trying to go over rocks, he is about 55 years old. Seems he is ok, later yesterday afternoon he wheeled by my house and turned around in my driveway. That was a good site to me, I pray for people. I pray for people I've never met, probably will never meet and I hope others do the same for me.
Spent time trying to set up an account,http://www.facebook.com/sunrise1ocs
Maybe it will bring pleasure to people and knowledge. I have to trot out to the mailbox and drop a letter I wrote to my aunt, she is almost 90 years old, and still making life great!
Today is going to be a very good day!!!Thank you Lord, I love you!!!
Hard to believe it's been so long since I've written anything, especially since I visit here most every day. I've been in a great deal of pain and needing to make life altering decisions at the same time. Yesterday was my youngest daughters birthday. I received Dragon software for Christmas, but my xp saids I don't have enough memory to support it. Yesterday I bought a SUV, needed a vehicle badly. My old pick-up truck well is just that my old pick-up truck. I like that truck and didn't trade it in. That truck will take me any place I want or need to go, but the up keep is hard. There is something wrong with the brakes now. But as much as I've wanted a SUV I didn't like putting that much money down on one. I don't want to think about my throat, it hurts most all of the time and wakes me up. My middle daughter is angry at me because she lives so far away and it is difficult for me to get down there as much as we would both like, she is having a problem with her computer disconnecting a lot and I don't know how to tell her to fix it. I know she has high speed internet it is in her cable plan. I feel as if I am stuck between a rock and a hard place since I really don't feel well and can't drive down there right now. I have not told them about my throat. A couple days ago Belle was outside playing, I didn't think about hunting season. A pack of 7 dogs came running through my fence, about scard her to death. I got her and she is safe, I chased those dogs away. I've spent over 600.00 dollars in food the last month and a half, yet you couldnot tell it by coming in here. and I cook everything by scratch. It is not like I buy processed foods. I don't know how people do it, the ones with small children. God bless them. Today I need to do laundry; clean out my wood stove; and write letters. I'd like to have a sunny day and just go mow, that is so relaxing to me. Today is going to be a good day!!! Thank You Lord, I love you!!!
My mood: extremely positive
Today was almost like many other days except I got to talk to my oldest daughter. I don't look forward to the holidays as I once did as a small child, but there are reasons for that. Some how I dread them until I wake up on Thanksgiving mornings and realize that it is a good season.
I found out the night before last that my mother was taken from a nursing home to a hospital with pneumonia. Why she ever decided to move so far away is beyond me. I think it is for the best thought. She didn't want me when I was born, she never wanted anything to do with me as I was growing up, so why do I try to help her? Am I stupid? I write to her once a week in that nursing home, I found out on facebook that she had been taken to that hospital, so I called her yesterday and toluld call her today when I did call her,twice she would not answer the phone. I've sent her gifts, thinking I am helping her.
She seems to hate me like I messed up her life, when in fact she messed up my head as a child by letting me know she did not ever want me. I've heard her say that she hated my dad and is glad he is dead. I really must be stupid for trying to reach out to her.
I am better off without her. Yet, there is something inside of me that thinks of how I would hate to me in a place like that all alone, no one to write or call me.
I am grateful that I found EP and this blog to write me feelings about, seems to lessen the blows some how.
Thank you Lord, I love you!!!
My mood: extremely good very good!
Yesterday was a good day, a lazy day but a good one. Cleaned my bed room and played with Belle most of the hours. Watched some tv, realizing I need to read more. Once you've hit the re-runs it is boring. As I was driving home from town yesterday I heard a song I've not heard in years can't remember the name of it but it is by Led Zepplin, not stairway to heaven. Wonder if this area is going to get any snow this year? From October through February are my busest months for birthdays, every time I look at my calendar I see 2 or 3 cards that need to be mailed. I enjoy other peoples birthdays as much as they do I think. Just wish I could be at all their parties to see them again. My guage saids it is 43 out there but I am not so sure it is right, but it was 54 yesterday-high.
Thank you Lord, I love you!!!
My mood: extremely excellent better everyday
4:a.m. I finished the second sleeve to the sweater I made. First one I've ever made, but not the only thing I've ever crocheted. Yesterday after leaving here about noon I went into town had to buy meds., and food then on to a store for liquid insents. The price of gas is suprising me it was 3.29. There was a sundog in the sky yesterday and it did start raining a little, well it was a small sundog. Belle did well while she was alone. Growing so tall. She likes to be held for some reason.
I was thinking about how lucky I am right now after the life I've lived. I could have been killed at most any point of my journey(s.) The person I was with was not trust worthy. We traveled all around the United States together. Memories some good some not so good, but the states are all beautiful.
Some thinking would have to go into it but nothing would have to be made up or lied about. A tell all about what it is really like to travel on a shoe string.
God was with me and got me to a better place. Yet this place is not very good. There are a few things in this life that bother me one is when I hear someone cutting themselves (or someone else) down or hearing them sai I can't. I enjoy people too much to listen to that, and for some reason I find myself helping them or showing them how even if we are learning together.
Spent half the day in town yesterday like I was saying it felt good to get away from here.
Thank you Lord, I Love You!!!
I am so grateful to our Father God. There is a verse in the Bible that saids (Jesus) physician heal thyself. I bought a copy of "You the healer" the world famous Silva method on how to heal yourself and others. I received this copy on October 23rd, 2012. and with minimual effort I feel as if I am about healed. MY throat that is. That knot doesn't bother me like it did. I really believe it is healing. After falling asleep one night with healing visions and thoughts with prayer upon waking up I cought (something I don't normally do.) Blck scab like pieces came from my throat small pieces. Now I am feeling so much better. I still have not tryed the true test of eating spicy foods, but that was never my cup of tea anyway. I bought this book from Biblo books on the internet. I did order a used copy for 1.39 but they mailed me a brand new copy. I've ordered many books from Biblo and they always come through for me, their books are always clean and neat. But this Silva method is in aline with God's word and it is working. I am so grateful!!!
This morning I ordered myself a 7 inch ipad tablet case on ebay for 10.99 free shipping. Walmart wanted 29.97 for the same case, and it is new and has things with it like a car charger; pen;and a couple other things.
Had a wicked dream last night woke me up at 11:p.m.. I will rest later if I need to.
Lit a white candle and incent to that God for his promise to use of healing.
Thank you Lord, I Love You!!!
My mood: a bit better and better everyday
What a beautiful Day! Cold but beautiful. "Happy Veterans Day!" Thanks to all of our women and men keeping us free to go to the parks, grocery stores, doctors offices, places of employment, and all the other things we have available to us. Without bombs flying over our heads. I'd like to go to Disney World some day. Wonder if I could take Belle in there? Woke up at 4:a.M. at *:a.m. I have to feed my animals, like normal. If not they will be at the feeding area. A nice cup of hot tea to begin my day, and I am off... . Think I will spend a part of my day with my art. I wonder how many people here on EP have art projects and if they are like me. I start several projects at the same time so I never run out of things to do, as soon as I finish one I begin another to take its place. I really should have started another quilt by now. Got into learning sketching and just didn't. There is away of tieing photos with quilting I think I am going to send sometime learning that art. Today is going to be a wonderful day no matter what because I am in control of my life! Thank You Lord, I Love You!!!
My mood: a bit extremely alive,wonderful
The people on EP have to be the best any where on the internet!!! I enjoy coming here so much. They make me feel better and they seem to be so honest and regular people, like me. I made a list of things I am grateful for everyday. Of course Gods love was #1 but I did include EP. I am grateful everyday not just one day a year. But to be honest there are many people that feel that way. By the time (I thought I was done) I stopped writting and went to rest several more things popped into my mind. and the list is still growing. It is ok to be grateful for the smallest things, like the grass growing, and the way it looks when it has just been mowed. I think I am going to continue my list and see if it ever ends. God is so good! Thank you Lord, I love you!!!
My mood: extremely alive
I am feeling a lot better today then I have been last several days. So good I got two letters written and beneficiary filled out for my second life insurance policy finished. Belle is feeling better gave her flea med. from a vet. Comfortis, and then I bathed her to remove the dead fleas, she sleeps so much better. My mother received the doll I mailed her, she is so far away, being in a nursing home well I just wish I could go there. I need a pickup or suv something that will pull my camper so I can stay there, around where she is. I don't think she will leave there alive. Makes me so sad. I can only afford a couple thousand for a vehicle and no one in this small town has one for sale, not like I need. I've been up all night, I need to go lay down meditate and pray, later I have to go get meds. in town. Hope the weather is going to be nice. Thank you Lord, I love you!!!
My mood: extremely better than yesterday!
Election day. I am almost ready to go vote a few hours sleep and get dressed etc. and I will be out the door. Washed two loads of laundry yesterday. Haven't been feeling well lately, my throat has been hurting. Gave Belle a bath and dip last evening. Mailed my mom a new doll, she is in a nursing home in champaigne,Illinois. Alzheimers disease. I think this doll will bring a lot of joy in her life, something to hold onto when she is alone and it may help her to lay down and sleep. I didn't cook anything for dinner last night. I did eat a apple though. Today is going to be a very, very good day!!! Thank you Lord, I love you!!!
My mood: extremely very good mood,
I don't know why but it seems that every time I turn around I am looking for a way to contact my dad. My dad passed on many years ago. I didn't go to his funeral because I wasn't around and was not aware of him passing. Not sure why I want to hear from him except I need guidance at this point in my life. I was never close to him or my mom, so why do I feel like it would be nice to contact him? I was told that he passed sometime in the month of September way back in 1984, but the person that told me this was not sure. I am not in that area to visit his grave. I was told that he was very angry at me when he passed and before he passed. Maybe I need to talk to him to ask why, for guidance, and to see if he will tell me about my future. I have been toldd that we all have spirit guides, then why don't I feel mine around me helping? This has to be the hardest plato to be on, especially alone. Thank you Lord, I love you!!!
Been raining like this a couple days. Went out side a few times, twice to go with Belle, once to the mailbox to send my mother a letter and to my small camper then another time to my big camper. Laid down at 7:30p.m. to rest my spine and fell asleep, woke up at 9:45p.m.. Dishnet work has been going off for seconds at a time. I've been tring to see how the northern states have been doing, they seem to be having a rough time, I am going to light candles,incents and pray/meditate for them. Maybe God will see fit to put a bridle on it. That doctor called here before noon today but I was busy and couldn't get to the phone. Working on myself a beret, crochet. Thank you Lord, I love you!!!
Belle woke me up at 6:35a.m.. Belle is my 3 month old puppy. She had to go outside to use the restroom. I don't know what I expected when I laied down, about 2:a.m., it is normal for the electric to go out around here after the first threat of storm. But the lights are still on right now. Wonder how the rest of the east coast is doing? Sandy, this freak storm, as it is being referred to, is supose to be of Bibical proportions. Nostrodaumus could had been right. He also said manhind would not come to an end until around 3064, I believe I heard on the history channel. I do know that something is up because the 3 cats outside are acting strange. I am going to feed all my animals early so they can go get in a safe place. Thank you LOrd, I love you!!!
My mood: extremely Good mood, slept well.
That storm is supose to knock out energy her for 2 weeks. I put about 10 -2 liter bottles of fresh drinking water in the freezer for my cooler, I also put fresh drinking water in water containers. Not sure if it enough to last two weeks though. When I put Belle out it is cool out there, I could hear the wind russling through the tops of the woods aways back. I think just the thought of a hurricane scares us (me and Belle.) All of my home made quilts are on my bed, plenty of firewood. I may need to go buy things to eat that don't need energy to store like peanut butter, crackers, I will think of something else. Better get Belle a case of alpo, that is her favorite, maybe it will act as a comfort food to her. Went to my small camper and retrieved 2 cross stitch things I bought years ago, this maybe the time to teach myself cross stitching. I've always wondered if it can be done on regular fabric. Like embroidry. Charged all of my batteries, doubt if they will last 2 weeks. Filled up a kerosene lamp, have candles on my alter, don't like to use them unless I am meditating and praying but I think God will forgive me. I sure hope I haven't forgotten anything. Thank You Lord, I love you!!! Maybe if someone can think of something I've forgot they will remind me or make suggestions.
My mood: extremely calm
The sky is already dark here, been raining off and on simce yesterday. All day long all I've been hearing is yelling and Belle barking. All of the sudden it got quiet. Hopefully they both fell asleep. I heard about Sandy. Been told it may come right through here. May need to get out of here. The electric always goes out here sincee I live so far out in the country it takes a lot longer for the comp. to get the lights back on. Twice its gone out for a week. Last summer was the worst. Had to go check into a local motel, it was 105 here and no air stirring. Had a new born kitten that its mother died, I was trying to keep that kitten alive. Went to the local pet shop and bought formula for it, that stuff is expensive, but I didn't mind. Two weeks after the energy came back on it passed in my hands. Vet. said it had breathing failure. I found that kitten after I found its mother. It was laying on the ground right next to my back door steps. Don't have a clue how it got there. Angel of the Lord I would supose. Halloween is coming up, my favorite. It is too lonesome around here for christmas. and as far as thanksginving I am always grateful for everything. No matter what as long as I am able to grab my computer and get to a motel I'll be fine. Don't want to forget the new book I am reading. Belle! I wonder if a motel will let me take her? WOW!! I better try to get a plan just incase they say no. Thank you Lord, I love you!!!
My mood: extremely optimistic, hopeful
Woke up a 9:30a.m.. Let Belle out, did some reading. I was able to just set quietly today and meditate. Started at 2:45P. and reached my alpha level. I could have worked on myself for a long time, just didn't have a long time. I heard on the weather channel that a very bad storm is headed this way. Hopefully the electric won't go out. Tried a new recipe this evening, doesn't have a name. I put it in one of my diaries. Then I dipped Belle, she is sound asleep. That dip kills fleas and ticks, she sleeps so much better, she looks and smells better as well.
There some good shows coming on at 9:p.m. "what is the Earth worth" it is worth a lot more than what they are going to talk about. What is a persons life worth? More than any amount of money thats for sure. I have'nt been to facebook since I found EP. maybe I should go check out my messages. Thank you Lord, I love you!!!
My mood: extremely Life is Great!!!
Previous PostsMarch 22, 2013; Friday; 11:50P.M.; 29 dregrres., posted March 22nd, 2013
February 29th,2013,7:38A.M., 35 degrees Thursday, posted February 28th, 2013
February 19th, 2013;34 degrees;79 in my bdrm.; Tuesday; Good Day!, posted February 19th, 2013
January 14th, 2013; Monday; 7:29 A.M.; 61 outside; 82 in my bedroom., posted January 14th, 2013
December 3rd, 2012; Monday; 6:28a.m.;cool outside., posted December 3rd, 2012
November 30th, 2012 Friday, 2:56A.M.., posted November 30th, 2012
November 22nd, 2012 Thursday, 11:39P.M.,31f, Thanksgiving Evening., posted November 22nd, 2012
November 18th,2012 Sunday,2:39A.M., 43 degrees, posted November 18th, 2012
November 16th, 2012, 5:07a.m., Friday,32degrees, posted November 16th, 2012
November 14th, 2012; Wednesday;5:46a.m.;30degrees., posted November 14th, 2012
11-11-12 Good morning(Sunday) World 7:13A.M., posted November 11th, 2012
Second Time around:11-10-2012; 9:48P.M. Saturday night, posted November 10th, 2012
November 10th, 2012, Saturday 6:09A.M., posted November 10th, 2012
November 6th, 2012, Tuesday, 12:16a.m., posted November 5th, 2012
November 4th, 2012 Rainning, 1:35a.m., posted November 4th, 2012
October 29th, 2012, Monday, Rain, 40f, 11:p.m.., posted October 29th, 2012
October 29th, 2012 Monday, 7:A.M. Raining., posted October 29th, 2012
October 28th, 2012 Sunday, 1:48A.M., posted October 28th, 2012
October 27th, 2012, saturday, 6:05P.M., posted October 27th, 2012
October 25th, 2012 8:34P.M.,64F. What a wonderful Day it was!!!, posted October 25th, 2012
I think they call this "hump" day? October 24th, 2012, posted October 24th, 2012
October 23rd, 2012 Tuesday -Already., posted October 23rd, 2012
October 21st, 2012, A Beautiful Sunday Morning., posted October 21st, 2012
October 19th, 2012 Friday TGIF, posted October 19th, 2012
October 18th,2012 Thursday, posted October 18th, 2012
Oct. 17th, 2012 "hump" day, posted October 17th, 2012
october 12th, 2012, posted October 12th, 2012
October 9th, 2012 5:55A.M., posted October 9th, 2012
October 5th, 2012, posted October 5th, 2012
October 5th, 2012, posted October 5th, 2012
September 30th, 2012, posted September 30th, 2012
Thursday, September 27th, 2012, posted September 27th, 2012
Wednesday September 25th 2012 already, posted September 26th, 2012
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